The Good News About Marriage: Debunking Discouraging Myths About Marriage and Divorce
by Shaunti Feldhahn
A Review By Tom Kennedy
Quick quiz: What is the divorce rate for marriages in the U.S. Well, you are wrong. The divorce rate is MUCH lower for all marriages. One of the most discouraging aspects of doing pre-marital counseling was trying to giving hope to couples who have heard that they there is only a 50% chance of having a successful marriage. All pre-marital and marriage counselors were looking for something positive to tell couples.
A few years ago I ran across a book by Shaunti Feldhahn by the name of The Good News About Marriage: Debunking Discouraging Myths About Marriage and Divorce. Feldhahn writes easy-to-read books based on scientific research. While writing for a different book, she tried to find the original research that pointed to a 50% divorce rate. She couldn’t find it. Her research showed that scholars had been misquoting a projection by stating it as fact. She found in her own research that the divorce rate was significantly lower for first marriages and even more surprisingly much lower rates for second and third marriages.
I personally went to some of the research sites found in the book to see if her findings were correct. The best website showed that baby boomers have the highest divorce rate of about 37.5%. That is far from a 50% divorce rate. However, every other subgroup, and especially young couples, have much, much lower rates of divorce.
I quickly added this book to my required textbooks for my university undergraduate and graduate classes. Every semester for three years at least one student per class and sometimes several students told me that they were now open to marriage after reading the book. They commented that they had been too discouraged to take a 50/50 chance on marriage. Now knowing that the odds stacked in their favor, they have hope for a successful marriage.
This book should be required reading for couples who are thinking about marriage. I also recommend it for church youth groups and church single adult groups. Give it to young marrieds and to unmarried couples for Christmas or Valentines Day. Because the research is clear: There is hope for a long-lasting marriage.
Order it Here
“In the thirty-two years I have been deeply immersed in the world of marriage ministry, I have been demoralized at times by the negative statistics quoted. And now I am ecstatic as I read the truth in this incredible book. Thank you, Shaunti, for doing the hard work necessary to expose the myths and lies and for finally revealing the facts about marriage. This book and the undeniable research in it is a game changer!”
Founder and CEO of MarriageToday, Senior Pastor of Trinity Fellowship
“This is an important book. Shaunti and Tally do an impressive job of showing that there is room for different viewpoints on divorce statistics and room for optimism about marriage. I believe that people make higher-risk choices partly because they have lost hope in marriage, and this book presents a basis for real hope.”
—Dr. Scott Stanley
Coauthor of A Lasting Promise, Research Professor at the University of Denver